Our eyes usually follow our thoughts, and sometimes, just by looking into our eyes, other people can understand what we are thinking about. Would you agree that reading another person's thoughts through their eyes is a very useful skill? Thanks to this, everyone will be able to understand whether they are being deceived or determine whether your interlocutor is interested in what you are telling him about.
Professional poker players are fluent in this useful skill...
"Eyes to eyes". Such contact with the interlocutor indicates that he is very interested in talking with you. Prolonged eye contact may indicate that the person is scared and/or doesn't trust you. Brief eye contact means the person is anxious and/or not interested in talking to you. And the complete lack of eye contact indicates the complete indifference of your interlocutor to your conversation.
The man looks up. Eyes raised upward are a sign of contempt, sarcasm, or irritation directed at you. In most cases, such a “gesture” means a manifestation of condescension.
If a person looks at the upper right corner, he visually imagines the picture stored in memory. Ask someone to describe the appearance of a person, and your interlocutor will certainly raise his eyes up and look to the right.
If a person averts his eyes to the upper left corner, this indicates that he is visually trying to imagine something. When we try to use our imagination to visually “draw” some picture, we raise our eyes up and look to the left.
If your interlocutor is looking to the right, it means that he is trying to remember something. Try asking someone to remember the melody of a song, and the person will definitely glance to the right.
Looking to the left, people come up with sounds. When a person imagines a sound or composes a new melody, he looks to the left. Ask someone to imagine the sound of a car horn underwater, and they will certainly look to the left.
If your interlocutor lowers his eyes and looks to the right, this person is conducting a so-called “internal” dialogue with himself. The person you're talking to may be thinking about something you said, or they may be thinking about what to tell you next.
If a person lowers his eyes down and looks to the left, he is thinking about his impression of something. Ask your interlocutor how he feels on his birthday, and before answering you, the person will lower his eyes and look to the left.
By lowering our eyes, we show that we do not feel very comfortable or even embarrassed. Often, if a person is shy or does not want to talk, he lowers his eyes. In Asian culture, not looking a person in the eye and looking down when talking is the norm.
These "rules" are generally followed by all of us. But left-handed people do the opposite: right-handed people look to the right, left-handed people look to the left, and vice versa.
How can you tell if someone is lying to you?
There is no absolutely correct algorithm by which you can determine whether your interlocutor is lying or not. The best option is to ask a basic question, such as “what color is your car?” If a person raises his eyes and looks to the right (or left, if he is left-handed), then he can be trusted. Thus, in the future you can understand whether you are being deceived or not.
For example, while telling you about something that happened in class, your friend looks to the right; When talking about his holidays, he constantly looks up and glances to the right. Most likely, everything he said is true. But when he tells you about the beautiful girl he met the other day, and his eyes are directed to the upper left corner, you can conclude that he is clearly "embellishing."
By learning to control his gaze, a person can force others to trust him unconditionally. (How can you lie while looking a person straight in the eyes?)
Why doesn't a person make eye contact? There is a widespread belief that he is telling lies and deliberately hiding his gaze so as not to reveal his real intentions. This may well be true, but there are a number of other reasons why the interlocutor specifically avoids eye contact. A person may not make eye contact because of his character, temperament, lack of courage, or lack of self-confidence. The qualities that form the personality in each of us are expressed differently, and this affects how sociable a person is and how he behaves during a conversation.
A person does not make eye contact when talking - here are the main reasons:
Shyness
This fact has been confirmed by scientific research. A person knows that a glance can give away feelings, so he deliberately averts it. Many lovers try to hide their increased interest because they are afraid to openly express their feelings or are waiting for the right moment. If at the same time your interlocutor blushes and begins to say some nonsense, then love is obvious here!
Diffidence
These people find it difficult to communicate with others because they constantly worry about what people will think of them. An insecure person rarely makes eye contact, and often does so furtively, because he is very worried about his emotional experiences and thinks about how best to behave during a conversation.
The interlocutor's heavy gaze
Such people are often called energy vampires, who seem to deliberately “drill” with their gaze, wanting to suppress and show their superiority. The heavy, gaze of the opponent seems to penetrate the interlocutor, causing discomfort and causing unpleasant emotions. In these cases, eye contact is very difficult, so many try to avoid it, for example, by lowering their eyes to the floor.
Irritation
Some people may be tired of attempts at close eye contact on the part of their interlocutors; they think that they are trying to catch them in something bad and experience unpleasant emotions and irritation about this.
What the interlocutor says is absolutely not interesting
If an averted indifferent glance is combined with a yawn, and the person you are talking to often looks at his watch, then you should quickly stop this dialogue, since it is ineffective. In this case, there is no sense of verbal and non-verbal exchange of information.
Intense information flow
In a few seconds of close visual contact, you can get a very large amount of information, which is equivalent to many hours of frank communication. Therefore, even during a confidential conversation, friends sometimes look away in order to distract themselves and digest the information received.
Why does a person close his eyes when talking?
A squinted gaze means precise concentration of attention on a specific object. A narrowed, intense gaze can indicate an increased tendency to criticism and hostility, and also reveal the callousness of the person. Half-closed eyelids of the interlocutor during a conversation indicate his high self-esteem, arrogance, swagger, and complete inertia to current events.
If the interlocutor closes his eyes without much effort, without squinting them, it means that he is trying to abstract himself from external events. Such self-isolation helps to concentrate well on thinking about some task, reflect on upcoming events and enjoy sensual visual images.
Considering the situation as a whole, it is quite possible to understand why a person hides his eyes when talking.
Should you always make eye contact? Types of views
Your interlocutor looks down and somewhere to the side, this always makes an unpleasant impression: either they are unhappy with us, or they don’t listen, but only pretend, or they laugh on the sly.
He does not look directly into the eyes of his interlocutor, but always sideways, turning his face half-turn. It seems that they do not trust you, they suspect you of something.
They look from under their brows. A feeling of confrontation appears, as if they hate you and are ready to answer “no” to everything.
A shifting gaze makes you feel as if standing in front of you is an eternally guilty, extremely insecure person.
An ever-drilling, withering gaze. They say about him: “heavy”. Are you despised? Do they want to subjugate? Those who are especially sensitive get chills from such a look. Some dictators specially developed it. To make their task easier, they looked at an imaginary point between the interlocutor's eyebrows, which is why this gaze is sometimes called the central one.
Many speakers speak as if for themselves, although they behave quite freely and look “at the clouds.” They don't seem to care whether you are interested or not. Finish the deal and leave, as long as they don’t interfere too much.
There are people who, looking at you, constantly squint, often their lips express a slight grin. You think they are making fun of you or disagree with what you say. No, they are not going to object, they are just silently enjoying the feeling of their own superiority.
How to look your interlocutor in the eye: a few rules
The one who is currently listening looks into the eyes significantly longer (this is logical: he is less busy). The speaker often looks away while thinking about the next phrase, and this is quite normal. It often happens that you speak, and your interlocutor looks into your eyes only until you do the same, but as soon as you try to catch his gaze, he immediately looks away.
Remember this unpleasant feature: staring into the eyes without looking away for a moment is also a bad manner. The interlocutor feels as if he is being “probed”; he will become nervous under such a searching gaze. Look calmly, kindly, with your face directly turned towards the interlocutor. Keep the optimal distance at which you both feel comfortable. If you tend to look from under your brows or sideways, then try to control yourself with an effort of will until the proper manner of looking becomes habitual for you.
If there are several participants in a conversation in front of you (even if they only act as listeners), then you need to periodically look into everyone’s eyes. Another thing is that more glances go to those who are leading in the conversation, but if you only look into the eyes of the leader, then the rest will feel superfluous. Of course, when you have an audience of thousands in front of you, you can’t look everyone in the eye, but eye contact is still necessary.
There is a kind of gaze etiquette: for comfortable communication, interlocutors should look into each other’s eyes for about 2/3 of the entire conversation. But this does not mean that you have to look point-blank without looking away: the optimal duration of the gaze is about 10 seconds.
Etiquette also requires that the interlocutors’ bodies be turned towards each other: speaking “over the shoulder,” “half-turned,” or even with your back turned is impolite. In any case, the face should be turned to the interlocutor: a sideways glance is not for business communication.
It is equally unpleasant when the interlocutor looks at you point-blank, without looking away for a second (“glares”), and also when he looks away almost all the time, showing that he is not interested in the conversation. True, it happens that a person who is unsure of himself, shy and timid always looks away. But such uncertainty and timidity does not look good on a business person. In addition, it is worth remembering that most listeners consider persistent reluctance to look someone in the eye a sign of lying. In fact, this is not always the case - but it is necessary to take this “folk sign” into account.
It also happens that the interlocutor looks at you, but as soon as you try to catch his gaze, he immediately looks away. It is also very unpleasant when the interlocutor looks from under his brows. All these are bad manners, but controlling your facial expressions and the direction of your gaze is more difficult than words - therefore, even the most well-mannered people sometimes unwittingly violate gaze etiquette.
What other rules does gaze etiquette contain? You should not look at a person too closely: neither familiar nor unfamiliar. This is especially important if he has physical disabilities. In addition, it is indecent to look at a person who is eating.
The “point of gaze” depends on the situation. When communicating in business, it is customary to look into the eyes of the interlocutor or at the point between his eyebrows. In a friendly relationship, the gaze glides over the interlocutor’s face, between the eyes and mouth. A gaze wandering between the eyes and chest of the interlocutor or descending even lower is only suitable for intimate communication: in a business situation this is a violation of etiquette.
When you're talking to multiple people (even if they're just listening), you need to make eye contact with everyone from time to time. Of course, they often look at the most active interlocutor, but if you look only into the eyes of the leader, the others will feel superfluous.
And the last thing: for comfortable communication you need to see the eyes of your interlocutor - therefore, when talking, you need to take off your dark glasses. Even glasses with slightly tinted lenses create awkwardness and disrupt the atmosphere of communication.
Sources:
https://glaz-almaz05.ru/blog/interesnye/chelovek-ne-smotrit-v-glaza.html
http://proeticet.ru/1_glaza.html
Our eyes usually follow our thoughts, and sometimes, just by looking into our eyes, other people can understand what we are thinking about. Would you agree that reading another person's thoughts through their eyes is a very useful skill? Thereby everyone can understand if they are being deceived or determine whether your interlocutor is interested in what you are telling him about. Poker players master this useful skill perfectly.
"Eyes to eyes". Such contact with the interlocutor indicates that he is very interested in talking with you. Prolonged eye contact may indicate that the person is scared and/or does not trust you. Brief eye contact- the person is worried and/or not interested in talking to you. A complete lack of eye contact indicates the complete indifference of your interlocutor to your conversation.
Man looking up. Eyes raised upward are a sign of contempt, sarcasm, or irritation directed at you. In most cases, such a “gesture” means a manifestation of condescension.
If a person looks in the upper right corner, he visually represents the picture stored in memory. Ask someone to describe the appearance of a person, and your interlocutor will certainly raise his eyes up and look to the right.
If a person averts his eyes to the top left corner, this indicates that he is clearly trying to imagine something. When we try to use our imagination to visually “draw” some picture, we raise our eyes up and look to the left.
If your interlocutor is looking right, this means that he is trying to remember something. Try asking someone to remember the melody of a song, and the person will definitely glance to the right.
Depending left, people come up with sounds. When a person imagines a sound or composes a new melody, he looks to the left. Ask someone to imagine the sound of a car horn underwater, and they will certainly look to the left.
If your interlocutor lowers his eyes and looks to the right, this person conducts a so-called “internal” dialogue with himself. The person you're talking to may be thinking about something you said, or they may be thinking about what to tell you next.
If a man lowers his eyes down and looks to the left, he thinks about his impression received from something. Ask your interlocutor how he feels on his birthday, and before answering you, the person will lower his eyes and look to the left.
Downcast eyes, we show that we do not feel very comfortable or even embarrassed. Often, if a person is shy or does not want to talk, he lowers his eyes. In Asian culture, not looking a person in the eye and looking down when talking is the norm.
These “rules” are generally followed by all of us. But lefties do the opposite t: right-handers look to the right, left-handers to the left, and vice versa.
How can you tell if someone is lying to you?
There is no absolutely correct algorithm by which you can determine whether your interlocutor is lying or not. The best option is to ask a basic question, such as “what color is your car?” If a person raises his eyes and looks to the right (or left, if he is left-handed), then he can be trusted. Thus, in the future you can understand whether you are being deceived or not.
For example, while telling you about something that happened in class, your friend looks to the right; When talking about his holidays, he constantly looks up and glances to the right. Most likely, everything he said is true. But when he tells you about the beautiful girl he met the other day, and his eyes are directed to the upper left corner, you can conclude that he is clearly “embellishing.”
By learning to control his gaze, a person can force others to trust him unconditionally. (How can you lie while looking a person straight in the eyes?)
The most accurate visual way of detecting lies is based on the movement of our gaze. They say that " eyes are the mirror of the soul", or "only your eyes can tell the truth", "your eyes don't lie."
Eye movement patterns are considered within the framework of its theory of Neurolinguistic Programming (NLP).
Observing a person, it is not difficult to notice that throughout the entire conversation his gaze is directed in one direction or another. Scientists associate gaze movement with the process of human perception and identify three main channels through which people receive and process information:
Visual channel. It is associated with visual images, everything that we see with our eyes;
Auditory channel. Associated with hearing, the sounds that we perceive;
Kinesthetic channel. All information related to sensations, feelings, smells, tastes, and experiences passes through it.
For each person, one of these channels, as a rule, is the leading one. Some of us live more by images, some by feelings, and some by stories and news and love with our ears! At the same time, each of us uses all systems as needed.
NLP Theory and Practice says:
- Eyes looking up give us figurative ideas.
- The eyes, walking along the horizontal axis, help us perceive and reproduce speech and sounds.
- If the gaze is directed downwards, this is associated with sensations or an internal monologue.
- At the same time: for right-handed people, the left side is the area associated with the past, the right side is associated with the future. For left-handed people it's completely the opposite.
Look at the diagram. It shows the movement of the gaze and the corresponding channel of perception. 
- The gaze is turned upward. It is difficult for a person in this position to think about anything (try it yourself). He's probably just avoiding the conversation and doesn't want to delve into the topic. Moves away
- VC. Look up and to the right (from the side of the interlocutor). Visual design. In this case, the person turns to the future or invents images.
- BB. Looking up and to the left - a person turns to the past, remembers some of his pictures (visual images). Visual recall.
- AK. Looking horizontally to the right - constructing speech, inventing.
- AB. Looking horizontally to the left - a person is in the past, he remembers speeches, words.
- Look down. Most likely the interlocutor cannot hear you. He was completely lost in his experiences.
- TO. Looking to the right and down is an experience, imagining oneself in the place of another;
- VD. Looking down to the left - internal monologue or dialogue, as well as recollection of one’s own experiences.
Let's try. Find someone to talk to who is willing to participate in your experiment. 
First, determine whether he is right-handed or left-handed. It depends not only on the leading hand. A person can also be a hidden left-hander. To determine this, there are special neuro-psychological tests. But at the beginning of the conversation, you can simply ask a security question formulated for the answer “Yes” - the answer to which you know for sure. Observe the oculomotor reaction. It is the very first, perhaps even fleeting, movement of the eye that is important. If it is directed to the memory to the left-up, side or bottom, then your interlocutor is right-handed. And vice versa.
Or: “Ask him to imagine green pancakes topped with red sour cream.” It’s unlikely he’s ever seen such a product. And look at the movements of his eyes, where his eyes often go when constructing an image. Please note that for some moments the gaze may be directed towards the memory of images (for right-handed people this is upward to the left), since a person, when inventing something new, always takes old memories and models them, changing them.
Enter into any dialogue and look into the eyes of your interlocutor and you will easily understand what he is doing now:
Remembers or invents images of familiar people and events;
Remembers stories told and someone’s speeches, or prepares to answer you by composing another phrase to himself;
Or perhaps your interlocutor is lost in his feelings, remembering feelings he once experienced, or he is very worried about your current conversation.
Did you manage to catch the trajectory of your gaze? Then boldly look your interlocutors in the eyes and learn further!
For right-handers: looking to the right and up, to the right and to the side - it means composing.
For left-handed people it's the opposite.
Important! When you look at your interlocutor, if he has a “right”, then you have a “left”!
In addition, it is worth remembering that lying is accompanied by negative experiences of shame and guilt. That is why a person who is deceiving will most often avoid direct eye contact. At the same time, he can choose the opposite tactic, look straight without looking away. They say about such a case: “He lies and doesn’t blush!”
Then you need sharp vision, which will help you notice the narrowing and dilation of the pupil. At the same time, if a person’s pupil narrows, it means he directs his consciousness inward - to memory; if it expands, then to the future, to design, to fantasy.
Remember that to establish the fact of a lie (when you are not yet experienced enough), always pay attention to: posture, facial expressions, gestures, voice, etc.
Observe, try, study and you will succeed!
It is welcome and permitted to reprint and distribute materials from the site, provided that their authorship is indicated and the text remains unchanged, provided there is a link to our site . Moreover, the link must be working!
