Every mother and father wants to provide their child with the best - to surround their child with comfort and coziness, to provide the best toys, clothes, and then to provide the child with a quality education... But here’s the paradox: in order to surround the child with material benefits, parents have to “work hard” for days at work , devoting very little time to communicating with your child. The simple joys of family life fade into the background, but it is the little things, such as a day off together, that will form the basis of the memories of a happy childhood in the future.

So what should you do in order not to lose touch with your own child, but, on the contrary, to strengthen your relationship with him? Here is a list of rules for a caring parent for every day that will help all family members feel happier:

It is worth showing your child your love and unconditional acceptance.

Quite often, parents, without noticing it themselves, position their love for their child as a commodity: “you give me ... - and I will love you in return.” This is heard in many parental demands (“I will treat you well when you behave well, study with straight A’s, clean your room...”), and, as a result, the child becomes vulnerable, because even his own parents cannot accept him just the way he is! To avoid this situation, parents must show their unconditional love for the child: often say “thank you,” “I love you,” and other tender words.

Unconditional acceptance does not mean approval of everything the child does. You can simply disapprove of the child’s individual actions, and not his personality as a whole. For example, instead of the standard “failing student,” you should say “I’m upset that you got a bad grade again” - this statement does not blame the child, but at the same time makes it clear that his poor performance upsets you.

Talk about your feelings with your child

Of course, many adult problems should not be discussed with a child - things that he cannot understand, or that he cannot help you with at all. However, in many cases, talking with a child about feelings (both his and your feelings) is beneficial: it strengthens the connection between you, helps establish child-parent closeness, and develops empathy and responsibility in the child.

It is worth noting that talking to a child about feelings and becoming a child’s “best friend” are not the same thing. There are topics that cannot be discussed with a child - relationships and quarrels with the other parent, for example, should become taboo. But you can and even need to talk about the feelings that arise in you in response to the child’s actions. It is also necessary to talk about the child’s feelings - sometimes it is very important for children to find out whether what they feel is normal, how to cope with negative experiences, etc. A conversation with a loving parent in such a situation is the best way out.

Take an active interest in the child's life

Always relevant advice: ask during dinner together (or just in the evening) how the child’s day went, what events it was filled with, what was good, etc. If your child has any problems, you can discuss it and provide support. In addition, showing such sincere interest strengthens the bond with the child and helps him feel important and loved.

Praise your child for achievements

It is very important to express approval and praise the child, sometimes even in the presence of other people. The child will be pleased to know that you are proud of him. However, it should always be taken into account that praise can only be given for real achievements: firstly, the child must develop adequate self-esteem, and therefore it is very important to teach him to fairly evaluate his achievements and mistakes; secondly, if you start praising a child, even a small one, after an obvious failure, this will greatly upset him. When a child experiences failure, he needs to be supported in this state, pointed out to his real achievements and helped to find ways to avoid this mistake in the future.

Bring humor into relationships

Seriousness haunts us literally in everything - we need to take our studies, work, organizing our lives very seriously... How, sometimes, in this life we ​​lack a touch of humor! That is why it is very important to preserve this humor in family relationships. It is necessary to teach a child to laugh: at small troubles, at his own mistakes. The world will teach a child to go through life with a serious expression on his face, but only his parents can teach him to laugh.

Teach your child to forgive insults

The ability to forgive is a great art that must be taught from childhood. The nature of relationships with others, the level of our psychological well-being, and even our physical health depend on whether we know how to forgive.

Resentment can corrode a person from the inside, and anger pushes one to take actions that one can only regret later. The harsh experience of life teaches us this, and this experience should be passed on to the next generation - teach your child to forgive insults and move on.

Ask for help

Quite often, fussy parents try to have time to do everything in the world: to show their best at work, to cook dinner, and to wash socks... Of course, all this is done for the benefit of the family, but as a result, there is no time left for basic communication with this very family.

It is impossible to do everything alone. Or at least it will cost you a Herculean effort. That is why an even distribution of responsibilities is the key to success: what would be difficult to do alone can be easily accomplished by the whole family. And it is imperative to involve the child in the process of distributing responsibilities: firstly, this teaches responsibility, and secondly, this way the child can feel like a full-fledged member of the family, with his own rights and responsibilities. You need to start by assigning small and simple responsibilities to your child and gradually move on to more complex tasks - this way the process of adaptation to adult life will be easy and successful.

Admit your mistakes

Yes, not only a child should be able to “repent”. Sometimes responsible adult parents have to apologize to their child when they are really wrong. You need to be able to admit your mistakes - so you can teach your child this by your own example. In addition, this simple action will help create an atmosphere of complete trust at home, where all family members can admit their mistakes without shame. And then the child will not be afraid to admit his own mistakes, he will know: everyone makes mistakes, there is no shame in admitting them, and at home they will always understand and accept him, even with all the shortcomings and imperfections.

Value your child's opinion

If a child has already been trusted to do some work, then his opinion regarding family issues should be taken into account. Where there are responsibilities, there must also be rights - they always come together, two in one. Therefore, it is very important to take into account the child’s “voice” during “family votes”: where to go on vacation, how to spend a day off, etc.

It must be remembered that a child is a small but full-fledged member of the family, deserving love and understanding from the closest people in his life - his parents.

If you yourself do not treat your parents with respect and reverence, do not expect a similar attitude from them towards you. How you treat your parents - they will repay you in the same coin. How to improve relationships? Not every family can boast of ideal relationships. Sooner or later, parents and their children are faced with misunderstanding and a kind of disappointment. We offer tips on how you can improve your relationship with your parents.

  1. First, you need to treat your parents as friends, ready to help and support at any time. But nevertheless, the authoritative role must be maintained. By learning to respect your parents, you will gain respect for yourself.
  2. Quarrels and conflicts in the family cannot be avoided. These are completely natural things, especially when it comes to teenagers.

How to treat parents?

No matter what, your parents have the main say in the house - their opinion is decisive until the child reaches adulthood. Respect the authority of your parents - and they will respect your rights.
Despite your differences, remember your love and appreciation for your parents. 5 In some cases, showing respect to parents is not easy - for example, when they do not fulfill their parental duty, lead an unhealthy lifestyle, have a bad influence on the child and do not educate him. Nevertheless, these parents, whatever they may be, raised you - and therefore also deserve respect.
6

Attention

Don't push them away, but try to understand what they lacked in their lives and why they treat you worse than you would like. Even the worst parents give their child care and protection - remember this.

7 When resolving disputes and conflicts with parents, do not make a scene or raise your voice.

How to treat your parents

The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: “When a person dies, all his deeds cease, except for three: continuous charity; knowledge that other people can use, or righteous children who will turn to Allah with prayers for him” (Muslim). The Prophet (ﷺ) said: “Verily, man will continually rise in degree in Paradise and will say: “Where does all this come from?” They will answer him: “This is because your son asked for forgiveness for you.”

(Ibn Majah). The hadith says: “If a person who oppressed his parents, sincerely repenting of this, after their death, asks Allah for mercy on them, i.e. will often make dua for them, asking for forgiveness of their sins, then Allah will write his name among those who were obedient to their parents” (Abu Dawud). If we look at our attitude towards our parents, we will find that we very often neglect their opinion and show disobedience towards them.

One more step

Instead of being offended, try to listen to what your parents say? What do they teach? Sometimes by their behavior they teach the exact opposite: they attack so that you learn to defend yourself, they argue so that you can defend your point of view, you need to listen carefully, but resentment and irritation get in the way and obscure the deep true meaning of what is happening. And then your moms and dads also had parents... And their behavior is determined by the stereotypes that your grandparents imposed on them.

Important

Whether this is good or bad is not for us to judge. Moral principles are eternal, but morality and behavior patterns change over time and not always for the better. But the main thing is not the appearance of the action, but the inner, deep meaning.

But to understand the essence, you need to be harmonious and balanced yourself, otherwise you cannot hear the other. To hear another, you need to be silent.
In general, in order to hear and feel, you need inner silence.

Info

You just need to deal with these misunderstandings and turn over a new page in life.

  • Children, for their part, need to realize that their parents gave them life and sacrificed a lot in their lives for his good. Even if it seems to a child that at some point his parents are cold and indifferent to him, he must understand that this is not so.

Parents selflessly love their children, and such behavior is simply an educational moment.

  • Before making complaints to your parents, think about your imperfections. Therefore, do not ignore your parents’ requests, treat them with respect.
  • By respecting the authority of the parents, the child involuntarily evokes respect for himself and respect for his rights.
  • There is a category of parents who do not fulfill their family duty.
  • How should children treat their parents?

    It is necessary to stand up when they stand up or enter the room, showing them respect; knock when you come to them; you should not go ahead of them; raising your voice when near them is considered not to honor your parents. 3. You can’t blame them for anything; You should not look askance at your parents; look them in the face, frowning. The hadith says: “Whoever looks at his parents angrily does not obey them” (ad-Darukutni). Mujahid said: “A son should not restrain his father if he decides to punish him (with ta'zir blows).
    Anyone who looks their parents in the eye treats them with disrespect. And whoever offended his parents disobeyed them.” 4. Children should not speak in a raised tone in front of their parents. You cannot show that they are tired of them, you must accept their advice, and what the children want to tell them should be told in a soft, calm tone.

    Respect for parents

    When the younger one respects the older one, and the older one loves the younger one, a wonderful family atmosphere is created. Unfortunately, these days many people behave simply immorally.
    This behavior is expressed in the fact that they simply have a rude attitude towards their parents, they are insensitive. It is not surprising if you yourself have seen such people who have become completely indifferent to their parents. You can also read quite a lot of stories in newspapers telling about a child who has completely forgotten about his parents. Man is the most intelligent creature on our planet; he must respect and love his elders and his parents. And seeing such an attitude of children towards their parents, you can’t help but wonder, are we really the most intelligent creatures? For example, even a lamb kneels down before feeding on its mother's milk. The crow, being the smartest bird on the planet, feeds its parents when they grow old.

    How do children relate to their parents?

    If we are somewhere far from home, they will be very worried about us and will wait for our return. If we return late, they will look at us with worried eyes, asking if something is wrong. All this is the kindness and care of our parents, they carried us within themselves, nursed us, fed us, educated us and treated us when we were sick. None of us should forget how much effort, care and love our parents put into us. Confucius said: “We must value and protect our lives, since every part of our body was given to us by our parents. This is the basis of respect and love for our parents. If we strive to improve ourselves, then in this way we can maintain the reputation of our parents at their best.”

    How children should treat their parents

    Think about it, when was the last time parents allowed themselves extra things?

    • Spend more time communicating with them. Share your experiences, emotions, news. Even if at some point you feel a misunderstanding, your communication will be an excellent step to restore and improve relationships.
    • A child’s respect for older people and his parents is one of the most important rules of behavior. It is respect for elders that gives rise to good deeds in the future. It is difficult to even approximately describe the Herculean efforts our parents make throughout our lives to raise us as we are now.

      How much love, affection and care they put into our upbringing. What do they expect from us in return? They just need the child's honesty and respect for the parents.

      In this way we can show our gratitude to our parents.

    If we treat and love our parents in this way, then we set a good example for our children. Our children will treat us in the same way, and this is the key to harmony in our family. When a child is small, he does not do any work. His parents take care of his food, clothing, and the like. Parents help their child out of love. The child does not work - he can only complete small tasks around the house. But can this work compare with the work or expenses that parents do for him? If, having become an adult, a child does not understand what his parents gave him, then this is very great ingratitude. We, children, in turn, must always remember and understand the following three judgments: 1.

    Who gave me this body?2. Who educates and raises me?3. Who is giving me my education? The biggest disappointment and disappointment for parents is the insubordination and disobedience of their children.

    Relationships with parents

    Children grow up distrustful, have difficulty communicating, and show cruelty. Adolescence is considered the most difficult. Feeling condemned by their parents during this period, children begin to move away, and their parents have the feeling that they have stopped loving them. Despite any difficulties, the child must be allowed to feel your support and be given an example of the behavior of an adult to whom he or she should be guided. We can talk for a long time about how children relate to their parents. But, only the children themselves can truly sincerely give an answer. Of course, they won't tell you this to your face. It’s enough just to observe their behavior, communicate more, show your trust. Having felt psychological comfort in the family, the relationship barrier will be overcome. Only then will the child himself be able to show through his actions, behavior and obedience how he treats you and what he lacks.

    How to treat your parents

    Love mom and dad, don't upset them! It is very important to realize your guilt in time and apologize for your actions, if there is something to apologize for. #3 How do children treat their parents if they love them? Of course, every living person gets tired. Just imagine how tired parents are at work, who have to work hard at home to cook, wash, and clean. An integral part of education is instilling help. Children should help with something around the house and take on some responsibilities. Then mom will cope faster and will pay more attention to family and relaxation. For example, a father will probably help his daughter with her homework. So why not help her with something? #4 The closest people in the world are parents. Friends can betray, change, leave, there will be so many of them in life! But who will be there even when everyone turns away from the person? Of course, his mom and dad.

    Many people forget that in addition to rights, people also have many responsibilities. And children, in the legal field, are no exception to the rule. And if someone says, then it is immediately clear to everyone what they are talking about, but when it comes to listing responsibilities, many people are lost in this matter.

    So what responsibilities of children to their parents, according to Russian law, can you safely enumerate to your own and other people’s children? Is the child obliged to support his parents or can he forget about them? In this article, we will answer these and other most popular questions, revealing the essence of the family code in as much detail as possible.

    In the modern world, the upbringing of a minor is monitored not only by his parents, but also by special legal authorities. At the slightest violation of the education process, parents can be fined.

    To be sure, parents should remember that their children bear a certain level of responsibility towards them, so this article will focus on the rights and responsibilities of the child to their parents.

    Also, if your pupils have reached the age of majority, it will be useful to find out what responsibilities of adult children to support disabled parents are regulated by the Constitution of the Russian Federation.

    As such, there is no separate right for children in the family. When discussing this topic, lawyers rely on the “Declaration of the Rights of the Child”.

    It spells out the basic legal provisions of minors, which apply to absolutely all children, regardless of their race, nationality, religion, social status and other social criteria.

    The following children's rights must be respected in the family:

    1. The right to know people who are his.
    2. Live together with their parents and be raised by them (except when this is contrary to the interests of the child, there is a threat to his life and health).
    3. Reunite with your family, regardless of where they live (with the exception of special institutions).
    4. Respect from society and parents, to receive protection of rights from special bodies in case of aggression in the family (in our country this function is carried out by the guardianship and trusteeship authorities).
    5. Receive financial support from your family or payments from government organizations.
    6. Own the property values ​​of your parents (subject to cohabitation and the consent of the owner of the values).
    7. Express your own opinion, take part in solving family issues and help in difficult situations.

    In addition, there are other capital rights that are not related to family life. Namely:

    • free medical care in hospitals;
    • , the opportunity to attend educational institutions;
    • have your own first name, last name and patronymic;
    • obtain citizenship of the country by birthright;
    • to be protected from information and propaganda, which in one way or another may negatively affect morale, the educational process and upbringing;
    • not having or having lost his family, the baby can count on care and support from the state.

    Responsibilities of a child towards parents

    In addition to rights, each person also has a number of obligations to his loved ones, the surrounding society and the state.

    If the responsibilities of adults to children do not raise questions and are supported by public consciousness, then the responsibilities of children in relation to their parents are most often not fully understood by the majority.

    A minor is obliged not to violate the rights of other family members and society.

    From a legal point of view, he cannot be forced to comply with family traditions, upbringing norms and rules within the family. To fulfill certain obligations in the family before the age of eighteen, a person should be taught on an educational basis, and not required to fulfill it, according to the law.

    Relationships between relatives are formed on the basis of their initial attitude towards each other and upbringing. If the situation in the family is respectful and calm, then there should be no problems reminding the child of the child’s responsibilities.

    In the case where, from the very beginning, education was not given due importance or was not done correctly, only a family affairs specialist or psychologist will help, but not legal principles and coercion.

    So, based on this, we conclude that the child’s responsibilities to his parents only include not violating their civil rights and freedom.

    If children under eighteen years of age do not have any serious obligations to their family, then upon reaching adulthood, they officially acquire them. Moreover, all responsibilities are formally spelled out in government documents and an adult can be held accountable for failure to comply with the law.

    In the Family Code of the Russian Federation, there is a separate article that describes the relationship between parents and children, from the point of view of the law ().

    To avoid any questions, we will analyze the points of this article in as much detail as possible.

    Capable children who have reached the age of majority are obliged to provide for their parents if they are disabled and need help.

    Most often, people who have reached retirement age experience material need and a lack of funds. Only a small percentage of retirees continue to hold their jobs or take a less complex job.

    That is why a law was created that reveals the responsibilities of adult children to support their parents.

    The law covers citizens who have reached retirement age (for men - 60 years, for women - 55 years) and who do not have the opportunity to earn money. He obliges their children pay monthly allowance for room and board.

    The amount of alimony is determined by the judicial authorities, taking into account the salary and the presence of children of the payer.

    The same conditions apply not only to pensioners, but also to people who have a certain group of disabilities, as a result of which they are not able to work.

    Alimony payments are assigned according to three criteria:

    • utilities, rent, rental housing;
    • provision of food;
    • purchase of medicines.

    To claim payments from children, several prerequisites must be met. Namely:

    • majority;
    • supporting documents indicating the relationship (Birth Certificate);
    • capacity and mental health of the payer;
    • proof of the parents' need for financial assistance.

    Collection of fees can occur either in agreement with the payer (on a voluntary basis) or through legal proceedings. For the last option, you need to file a claim with the court for alimony payment.

    If the plaintiff has several children who do not want to voluntarily pay financial assistance, then the amount of payments is divided between them in accordance with the following criteria:

    • presence of supported children;
    • salary and general financial situation;
    • legal capacity.

    Cancellation of obligations

    The obligations of children to support their parents can be canceled if the child proves in court that the parent did not fulfill his or her duties of upbringing or maintenance.

    To confirm his words, he can invite other relatives and simply people who are well acquainted with their family to testify. Also, as evidence, a document according to which the minor lived separately from his parents for a long time may be useful.

    Deprivation of parental rights also relieves children from the obligation to support their parents.

    MUFTI RD AHMAD-KHAJI ABDULAEV

    Every parent sees in their child not only a joy for the eyes and the continuation of offspring, but also care for themselves in old age. However, for this it is necessary to instill a similar attitude in children. How children, when they become independent, will relate to their elderly parents directly depends on our upbringing.

    Therefore, I would like to touch upon the topic of children’s relationship to their parents – within the framework of the question “How should children honor their parents?”

    First of all, parents must make an effort, to instill in children fear of God and obedience to the Almighty, and then love, respect and obedience towards themselves. After all, they will be responsible on the Day of Judgment for their children for not raising them properly, as Islam prescribes.

    Honoring parents is one of the most important issues that the Almighty highlighted in the Quran after worshiping Him. The Almighty also linked the satisfaction of parents with the pleasure of Allah. Obedience to parents in everything that does not contradict Shariah is one of the duties that Allah has assigned to children.

    وَاعْبُدُوا اللَّهَ وَلَا تُشْرِكُوا بِهِ شَيْئًا ۖ وَبِالْوَالِدَيْنِ إِحْسَانًا

    In the Qur'an the Almighty says (meaning): "...Worship only Me and treat your parents well "(Surah An-Nisa, verse 36).

    Allah warns us to beware of expressing our irritation towards elderly parents, since their weaknesses and shortcomings are largely due to age. The Almighty also commands to show compassion towards parents and often make dua for them: “ My Lord, have mercy on them, because they raised me when I was little ».

    Not honoring parents, insulting them, oppressing them, causing them torment and insults is considered the gravest sin. This sin is mentioned in the same context along with associating a partner with Allah and killing a person. On the Day of Judgment, Allah will not bestow His mercy on the one who oppresses his parents - he will not even feel the aroma of Paradise, his good deeds will not be accepted.

    He will experience the consequences of disobeying his parents in this world, and at the moment of death he will not be able to pronounce the formula. This is said in many hadiths of the Prophet (ﷺ).

    However, some children, when they become independent, stop paying attention to their parents. How many mothers devote themselves entirely to ensuring that their children get on their feet, and then see them only on holidays. It also happens that a child who obeys his parents, tries to serve them, strives for their satisfaction, surprises us; this phenomenon has become so rare in our time. Today, parents most often follow their children and their desires.

    You can often see that children command over old parents, telling them what to do, where to live and what to be content with. This is a sign Judgment Day is approaching. At the same time, these same children are in a hurry to please their superiors, employers, etc., try to fulfill them beyond their instructions, patiently, without objection, obey them, saying that they are simply showing respect. In fact, it looks more like toadying.

    How does a person who strives only for worldly things show respect? Where is the line between submission, respect and sycophancy?

    The difference between submission and subservience is that submission is the fulfillment by a slave (man) of the commands of Allah Almighty or the orders of people, even if it is commanded in a desirable form. And also refusal of what is prohibited, even if this is indicated as an undesirable action.

    If a person obeys and fulfills the commands of Allah Almighty, as well as the commands of someone else, and refuses everything that they have forbidden, for the sake of receiving the pleasure of Allah Almighty, this is respect. Respect is the attitude of one person towards another, recognizing the merits of his personality. Respect is one of the most important requirements of ethics.

    However, if a slave (person) shows any respect to another person not for the sake of the pleasure of Allah Almighty, but only for the sake of the worldly and for his own pleasure, then this will be sycophancy. In general, pleasing people with authority and weight in society for the sake of Allah’s pleasure is sycophancy.

    When it comes to obeying their parents, children often show real aggression towards them, do not take into account their desires and interests, do not rush to help them, do not tolerate teachings from them and, moreover, break off relations with them - at that time , when the Almighty obliged to obey parents and seek their pleasure. Honoring parents in Islam is one of the forms of ibadah (submission to the Almighty).

    وَوَصَّيْنَا الإِنسَانَ بِوَالِدَيْهِ إِحْسَانًا حَمَلَتْهُ أُمُّهُ كُرْهًا وَوَضَعَتْهُ كُرْهًا

    The Qur'an says: (meaning): " We commanded man [i.e. e. commanded and obliged him] to treat his parents well, because his mother carried him in her womb with difficulty before birth and gave birth to him with agony "(Surah al-Ahkaf, verse 15)

    What does it mean to obey your parents? What are the responsibilities of children towards them? How should children honor their parents? What signs of respect should be shown to them?

    1. Children are obliged to obey their parents and always try to please them in everything that does not contradict the commands of the Almighty. Children should always remember that “The pleasure of Allah is in the pleasure of parents, and the wrath of Allah is in the wrath of parents” (At-Tirmidhi, At-Tabarani).

    The Prophet (ﷺ) was once asked: “ What deed does Allah love most? » – « Prayer performed on time “, was the answer. " And what is behind it? - they asked him. " Submitting to parents and trying to do good to them "(Al-Bukhari, Muslim).

    2. It's not enough to just have a good attitude towards your parents., you cannot do anything that would show disrespect for them. You must always behave respectfully in front of your parents. You should not laugh loudly, sit in front of them when they are standing, lie in an indecent position, or expose your body in their presence. It is necessary to stand up when they stand up or enter the room, showing them respect; knock when you come to them; you should not go ahead of them; raising your voice when near them is considered not to honor your parents.

    3. You can't blame them for anything; You should not look askance at your parents; look them in the face, frowning. The hadith says: " Whoever looks at his parents angrily does not obey them "(ad-Darukutni).

    Mujahid said: « A son should not restrain his father if he decides to punish him (with ta'zir blows). Anyone who looks their parents in the eye treats them with disrespect. And whoever offended his parents disobeyed them».

    4. Children should not speak in a raised voice in front of their parents.. You cannot show that they are tired of them, you must accept their advice, and what the children want to tell them should be told in a soft, calm tone.

    إِمَّا يَبْلُغَنَّ عِنْدَكَ الْكِبَرَ أَحَدُهُمَا أَوْ كِلَاهُمَا فَلَا تَقُلْ لَهُمَا أُفٍّ وَلَا تَنْهَرْهُمَا وَقُلْ لَهُمَا قَوْلاً كَرِيماً

    The Almighty said (meaning): “ ...If one of the parents or both reaches old age, do not say “uff” to them and do not shout at them, but say a noble word to them "(Surah Al-Isra, verse 23).

    5. You should know that providing for parents in old age falls on the shoulders of children, so they must buy clothes, shoes, food for them; if they cannot cook or move themselves, then it is necessary to either help them or hire a person who will look after them, cook, wash their clothes, etc.

    Old age is a period of life when parents most need help and kind treatment. The Almighty indicated this period of time because of man’s extreme need for someone who will care for him in old age, and also because it is known that it is difficult for a person to do various things at this age.

    AbuHuraira reports that the Prophet (ﷺ) said: “ Humiliation and shame for one who finds both of his parents in old age, one of them or both, and does not enter Paradise "(Muslim). That is, service and attention provided to parents in old age can become a reason for entering heaven.

    6. Children should help their parents in their affairs - as much as they can and in whatever way they can. It is not fitting for a son to walk lightly next to a father carrying a heavy burden. Children should not leave all the work of putting the house in order to their mother; on the contrary, they should take care of their clothes, shoes, wash dishes, clean up after themselves, make their bed, and so on. A daughter should help her mother to the best of her ability. Adult children must look after their younger brothers and sisters and take care of them. Children's good studies in school and madrasah are also considered to honor parents.

    It is reported that Jahima (may Allah be pleased with him) came to the Prophet (ﷺ) and said: “ O Messenger of Allah ( ), I'm going to go hiking and would like to consult with you " The Prophet (ﷺ) asked: “ Is your mother alive? " He replied: " Yes " Then he said: " Always be with her and help her, because Paradise is under her feet "(Imam Ahmad).

    7. Children are obliged to preserve the honor and dignity of their parents. You can’t do something that could cause people to speak badly about your parents or accuse them of something.

    The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: “ One of the most serious sins is a person uttering vicious words against his parents. " The Companions asked: “ O Messenger of Allah, are there really people who defame their parents? " He replied: " There are; one person scolds and defames the parents of another, and that person, in turn, scolds and defames the parents of this "(al-Bukhari, Muslim).

    8. If children need to go somewhere, first of all, they need to consult with their parents and go on the road after receiving their consent. If your parents call, you should respond immediately, whether you are at home, nearby, or on the road.

    9. After their death, it is necessary to fulfill their will, strengthen friendship with their friends and love those they loved. An authentic hadith says: “ Of all the good deeds you can do for your parents, keeping in touch with the people they loved is considered the best."(Muslim).

    10. Children should visit their parents' graves, constantly make dua for them and ask Allah for forgiveness and mercy for them, give alms for them.

    The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: “ When a person dies, all his affairs cease, with the exception of three: continuous almsgiving; knowledge that other people can use, or righteous children who will turn to Allah with prayers for him "(Muslim).

    The Prophet (ﷺ) said: “ Verily, man will continually rise in degrees in Paradise and will say: “Where does all this come from?” They will answer him: “This is because your son asked forgiveness for you. " (Ibn Majah).

    The hadith says: " If a person who oppressed his parents, sincerely repenting of this, after their death asks Allah for mercy towards them, i.e. will often make dua for them, asking for forgiveness of their sins, then Allah will write his name among those who were obedient to their parents "(Abu Daoud).

    If we look at our attitude towards our parents, we will find that we very often neglect their opinion and show disobedience towards them. May Allah have mercy on us. Such behavior is a great sin, and very often children do not even suspect that one or another of their actions is disobedience to their parents.

    AbuHuraira said: “A man came to the Messenger of Allah and asked: “ Who among people deserves my wonderful care most of all? " He replied: " Your mother " He asked: “ Then who? " He replied: " Your mom again " He asked: “ And then who? " He replied: " Your mom again " He asked: “ And then who? " He replied: " Then your father " (Muslim)

    Disobedience also includes the following actions:

    If a son or daughter can belittle the dignity of their parents , considering their opinion less significant, since they are smarter, richer, more educated, higher in social status, etc., which made the children proud.

    If the son considers other people (wife, friends and himself) superior to his parents and tries to please them .

    If a son or daughter calls their parents by name, thereby belittling them or disrespecting them .

    Speak noble things, be grateful, generous, calmly listen to your parents, show respect to them.

    Gratitude towards parents is associated with gratitude to the Almighty. The Almighty says (meaning): “ Thank Me and your parents "(Surah Luqman, verse 14).

    وَاخْفِضْ لَهُمَا جَنَاحَ الذُّلِّ مِنَ الرَّحْمَةِ وَقُل رَّبِّ ارْحَمْهُمَا كَمَا رَبَّيَانِي صَغِيرًا

    The Almighty commands us (meaning): “ Bow before them the wing of humility out of mercy and say: “Lord! Have mercy on them, just as they raised me as a child. "(Surah Al-Isra, verse 24).

    If you have intelligence, then beware of disobeying your parents, because... the consequences of this sin are very serious. Be pious to them, because... soon they may leave this world, and then you will regret that you did not do this during their lifetime. Piety towards parents is a quality of noble and decent people; it washes away sins, improves life, leaving a good mark after a person’s death.

    One day a man appeared to the Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ). In an effort to receive Allah's reward, he wanted to swear to him that he would migrate and fight in the path of Allah. However, the Prophet (ﷺ) did not rush and asked him: " Are any of your parents alive? "The man replied: " They are both alive ". The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: " And do you want to receive the reward of Allah I? "This man said:" Yes "Then the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) commanded him: “ So go back to your parents and treat them well! "(Al-Bukhari, Muslim).


    A child should know that his parents will accept him no matter what and will always love him. And in this case, the child will respect and trust his parents. They will be his authority, friends and best advisers. They will forever remain the most important people in his life. You know, it depends on how the parents themselves treat their children. No matter what anyone says, I will never respect parents for morally destroying their children, beating them, violating their rights. With respect, and be obedient. It should be like this, depending on how you position yourself with the child from the very beginning. And then there are those who feel that their parents indulge him in everything, begin to become impudent, and can publicly put him in an awkward position. Therefore, in some places he needs to be softer, in others he needs to be stricter. Sincerely. Children need to be taught to respect their elders and, in general, those around them. The main thing is to set an example.

    How to treat parents?

    From time immemorial to the present day, there has been a problem of fathers and sons. This is one of the most difficult aspects of family relationships.
    From the moment a child enters adolescence, conflicts with parents begin. Their culprits can be either parents who do not understand the needs of a child at a difficult age, or the child himself, who simply does not know how to approach his parents correctly in order to evoke their understanding.

    So, how should you treat your child’s parents so that mutual understanding and harmony reign in the house? Models of relationships The birth of a child in a family is the most important moment in the development of the relationship between spouses. During this period, they are especially closely united by their common love and care for the child.

    Only a united family can have a positive influence on a child. The formation of a child’s personality occurs in the first years of his life.

    How to treat your parents

    Attention

    When it comes to obeying their parents, children often show real aggression towards them, do not take into account their desires and interests, do not rush to help them, do not tolerate teachings from them and, moreover, break off relations with them - at that time , when the Almighty obliged to obey parents and seek their pleasure. Honoring parents in Islam is one of the forms of ibadah (submission to the Almighty).


    وَوَصَّيْنَا الإِنسَانَ بِوَالِدَيْهِ إِحْسَانًا حَمَلَتْهُ أُم The Qur'an says: (meaning): “We commanded man [i.e. e. commanded and obliged him] to treat his parents well, because his mother carried him in her womb with difficulty before birth and gave birth to him with torment” (Surah al-Ahkaf, verse 15) What does it mean to obey your parents? What are the responsibilities of children towards them? How should children honor their parents? What signs of respect should be shown to them? 1.

    One more step

    They, as a rule, lead an incorrect lifestyle, have a bad influence on the child and are absolutely not involved in his upbringing. However, no matter what they are, they still deserve respect.

    As you know, parents are not chosen.

    • If there is a conflict with your parents, there is no need to make a scene or raise your voice. A calm discussion of the problem will bring much greater results.
    • Find strength in yourself and learn to forgive your parents.
      Remember that in addition to their weaknesses, they also have a whole bunch of advantages and good qualities.
    • Always meet your parents halfway. They are people too and have the right to make mistakes.
    • Remember that when imposing any restrictions or prohibitions, parents think only about your future.
      Respect your parents' life experiences, as well as their experiences, feelings and desires.
    • Stop being selfish. Think beyond your needs and desires.

    This world was not invented by you and why this person behaves this way and not differently is difficult to understand. The cause-and-effect law is involved, since such a situation has arisen. Basically, the Soul itself chooses its entire Path of Life on Earth, including parents and country. But it happens that the Guardians of Karma send and forcibly correct the evil brought to people in the past incarnation.

    Important

    According to the principle of a pendulum (as it comes back, it will respond): - and now experience for yourself what drunken parents are... But if you launch the astral dirt of condemnation, indignation, irritation into your soul, then how are you better? There must be even light and Purity of Thoughts in the Soul. If you don't like it, don't participate in it. If you simply meet strangers in life for a reason, but for karmic reasons, then the connection between parents and children is very close.


    Their Souls must learn very important lessons in relation to each other. They are each other's teachers.

    How should children treat their parents?

    If a son or daughter calls their parents by name, thereby belittling them or disrespecting them. Speak noble things, be grateful, generous, calmly listen to your parents, show respect to them. Gratitude towards parents is associated with gratitude to the Almighty. The Almighty says (meaning): “Give thanks to Me and your parents” (Sura Luqman, verse 14). الذُّلِّ مِنَ الرَّحْمَةِ وَقُل The Almighty commands us (meaning): “Bow before them the wing of humility out of mercy and say: “Lord! Have mercy on them, just as they raised me as a child” (Surah Al-Isra, verse 24). If you have intelligence, then beware of disobeying your parents, because... the consequences of this sin are very serious. Be pious to them, because...

    Respect for parents

    Parents should be authorities for their children, they should be people to look up to and learn a lot from. Children, of course, should respect and love their parents, but only if they deserve it.

    If, for example, parents are drunks, then why should they be loved and respected? Children can treat their parents differently, this largely depends on the parents themselves. But children do not owe their parents anything. Everything that children do for their parents is their good will, which they show in accordance with their upbringing.

    You need to raise your children so that they are People! They know how to sympathize and respect, give a helping hand to others, and not cynical egoists. After all, your old age depends on your upbringing! Love your children.

    How do children relate to their parents?

    May Allah have mercy on us. Such behavior is a great sin, and very often children do not even suspect that one or another of their actions is disobedience to their parents. AbuHuraira said: “A man came to the Messenger of Allah and asked: “Who among people deserves my wonderful care first of all?” He replied: “Your mother.”

    Info

    He asked: “Then who?” He replied: “Your mother again.” He asked: “And then who?” He replied: “Your mother again.”


    He asked: “And then who?” He replied: “Then your father.” (Muslim) The following actions also include disobedience: – If a son or daughter can belittle the dignity of their parents, considering their opinion less significant, since they are smarter, richer, more educated, higher in social status, etc., which forced the children become proud. – If the son considers other people (wife, friends and himself) superior to his parents and tries to please them.

    How children should treat their parents

    This sin is mentioned in the same context along with associating a partner with Allah and killing a person. On the Day of Judgment, Allah will not bestow His mercy on the one who oppresses his parents - he will not even feel the aroma of Paradise, his good deeds will not be accepted.

    He will experience the consequences of disobedience to his parents in this world, and at the moment of death he will not be able to pronounce the formula for the testimony of Monotheism (shahadah). This is said in many hadiths of the Prophet (ﷺ). However, some children, when they become independent, stop paying attention to their parents.

    How many mothers devote themselves entirely to ensuring that their children get on their feet, and then see them only on holidays. It also happens that a child who obeys his parents, tries to serve them, strives for their satisfaction, surprises us; this phenomenon has become so rare in our time. Today, parents most often follow their children and their desires.
    Instruction 1 It is best to treat parents as friends who are always ready to support, but, nevertheless, have decisive authority in the family. By respecting your parents, you will earn respect for yourself, and in turn, parents who want respect from their child must respect the full and original personality in him. 2 Quarrels and disagreements with parents happen to every teenager, and you need to be able to cope with this misunderstanding. Realize that your parents are people who gave you life and sacrificed a lot for you, and even if it seems to you that at the moment they are indifferent to you, this is not so.

    Your parents always love you, no matter what you are. 3 When making complaints to your parents, remember that you are not perfect - just like them. Therefore, you should not ignore the requests of your parents. Treat them with as much respect and respect as possible.

    Relationships with parents

    The Almighty said (meaning): “...If one of the parents or both reaches old age, do not say “uff” to them and do not shout at them, but speak to them a noble word” (Surah Al-Isra, verse 23). 5. You should know that providing for parents in old age falls on the shoulders of children, so they must buy clothes, shoes, and food for them; if they cannot cook or move themselves, then it is necessary to either help them or hire a person who will look after them, cook, wash their clothes, etc.

    Old age is a period of life when parents most need help and kind treatment. The Almighty indicated this period of time because of man’s extreme need for someone who will care for him in old age, and also because it is known that it is difficult for a person to do various things at this age.

    How to treat your parents

    This is ordinary filial piety, there is nothing extraordinary about it. But if the parent is angry, old and wayward, if he always grumbles and repeats that everything in the house belongs to him, if he gives nothing to the children and, regardless of the meager means of the family, tirelessly demands drink, food and clothing, and if he, When he meets people, he always says: “My ungrateful son is so disrespectful, that’s why I lead such a life.

    You have no idea how hard my old age is,” thereby vilifying your children in front of strangers, then even such a grumpy parent should be treated with respect and, without showing any signs of irritation, indulge his bad character and console him in his aged infirmity. Giving oneself completely to such a parent is true filial piety.