I fought tooth and nail with that woman living inside my body. In my short life, I have undergone two plastic surgeries, gone on countless diets, and experienced every type of eating disorder there is. My main goal was to change myself: how I look on the outside and how I feel on the inside.
Everything was out of control - emotions and desires seemed inappropriate and shameful to me. My own body was foreign; looking in the mirror, I felt disgust. But one day, from the very depths of the abyss, the realization came that you can truly love your body only by stopping constantly monitoring your weight.
From that moment on, I began to learn to treat myself differently. As soon as emotions became travel companions on the road to happiness, and as soon as I stopped looking for loopholes through which I could escape my own feelings, the world changed.
So, below I list 10 signs of loving your body.
1. You listen to what it says.
When my body tells me I'm hungry, I eat. Feeling full and satisfied, I stop. Previously, I experimented on myself, depriving myself of food for a long time and seeing how long I could hold out. Naturally, there was only one result - overeating. I overate to such an extent that I could not move. The more often I began to pay attention to the signals sent by my body and follow them, the more healthy foods began to dominate my diet, and I felt lighter and more comfortable.
2. You change your body position
Having paid attention to yourself, you can find your body frozen in one position for several hours. When you love yourself, physical activity becomes a priority, there is a need to periodically get up and stretch, change your body position, and be sure to find time during the day for stretching exercises.
3. You exercise vigorously, but don't push yourself to the point of exhaustion.
My attitude towards my own body was not gentle. I constantly challenged him - I ran long distances, even when I was feeling unwell, I went to work out in a stuffy gym, thinking that I simply had to do this. But the truth is different. If you move in a way that feels comfortable to your body, you will always be in shape. I used to think that my body would never want to move. But after I finally discovered forms of physical activity that were comfortable for me, everything changed.
4. You wear comfortable clothes
Don't get me wrong, I'm talking about realizing the freedom to wear (or not wear) clothes as you wish. Sometimes I don't feel the need to wear a bikini and look sexy. In those moments, I try to respect my body's wishes and wear what makes it feel comfortable. This builds trust between us and makes it less likely to look for other ways to feel safe. For example, overeating.
5. You are in control of your sexuality.
For many years I was terrified of my own sexuality. Part of loving your body is recognizing and enjoying this important area of your life, despite how your body looks on the outside. Exploring sexuality in a safe, playful way with others or through your own way of being allows you to feel desirable in all parts of your body.
6. You don't wait until you reach your "ideal weight"
Regardless of what I did before, whether I went to parties and dates, took photographs, etc. — I allowed my weight to determine how well I lived my life. Gradually, I realized that my body only truly felt good when I lived to the fullest and followed my heart every moment of my life. This allows you to not look at food as the only source of pleasure.
7. Your wardrobe contains clothes of different sizes.
Due to the female natural cycle, the volume of the female body is constantly changing. For this occasion, I always have clothes in different sizes in my wardrobe. Therefore, in those moments when my curves acquire pleasant roundness, my body still feels accepted and loved. It knows that I trust it and will always wait until it reaches a more comfortable weight.
8. You pass by the scales with indifference.
My beauty and my self-esteem do not depend on the number stamped on the clothing label. I know I truly love my body when I don't spend time constantly weighing myself.
9. You don't compare yourself to others.
It's easy to get caught up in constantly comparing yourself to other women, especially when it comes to body measurements. This method of action has never brought relief to anyone. In my opinion, one of the signs of love for your body is the desire to get to know a person’s inner world better, and not interest in what he eats and how he looks on the outside.
10. You look at yourself in the mirror and smile.
We always find a lot of reasons explaining why we do not greet the woman reflected in the mirror. Try to smile sincerely every time you meet her gaze. Instead of focusing on the unattractive curve of your hips, pay attention to the captivating eye color and regular facial features. Looking in the mirror, try to consider the mysterious creature living in the wonderful cut of your body. See the body as a beautiful vessel that provides shelter and sustains life. Without asking for anything in return, it will be endlessly grateful for the care and affection from its owner.
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, as the main ingredient of femininity, let me ask a question that is closely related to this.How often are you satisfied with yourself? Are your results more often pleasing or frustrating during the day? As a child, were you often praised or told about how much more you needed to do?
“What does the answer to these questions and self-love have to do with it?” - you ask. Let's sort it out in order. Shall we begin?
1. Turn on the shower light
What is the difference between happy women and unhappy women? The ability to adjust your state, and also faith in yourself. Didn't have a good morning? And you show dissatisfaction? It grows like a snowball more and more, and by the end of the day, you are sure that it was not your day. Dissatisfaction can capture your attention.Don't give in to this temptation!
Mood is easy to manage. Form a new habit:get ready for a good day in the morning.Some people start the day with affirmations, some with prayer, and some with a smile and breathing practices in the fresh air.
Thank the Universe for giving you another chance to enjoy life. Ignite your inner light of positivity and maintain this state all day long.
Start your day calmly, with faith in your capabilities. Remember, what you reflect is what you receive from the world.
2. Form healthy habits
Self-love begins with self-care. If you are used to working extremely hard, don’t pamper yourself enough, have forgotten the last time you got enough sleep - it’s time to organize your morning, day and night.
Go to bed earlier. Try to make the transition smooth: go to bed half an hour earlier than the previous day. And so on until you reach the desired time of release and rise.
Take care of your body. Otherwise, exhaustion is just around the corner. No excuses: small children, reports at work, breakfasts for loved ones. First, you take care of your body (exercise, fitness, yoga), then you give cheerfulness to others.
Do you want to look well-groomed? Start pampering yourself with homemade masks. Train your body to care. And on your day off, be sure to go to a beauty specialist.
Eat right. As soon as you add your favorite dishes and healthy foods to your diet, you will begin to glow, be energetic and cheerful.
3. Give thanks to others
At first it will seem to you that there is nothing to thank them for. But if you learn to be more careful, you will see that you can:
- thank your mother when she reminds you about a visit to the doctor,
- thank the neighbor who told you that the water in the house will be turned off (for prevention),
- thank the cashier at the store for opening the package for you,
- thank your husband for picking up the child from kindergarten,
- thank the child for asking about what you dreamed about, 
- thank the stranger for letting you go ahead at the entrance to the supermarket.
Learning to love othersYou sharpen your self-love. . Take care of yourself and others with light in your soul, then you will see how your joy improves the world.
Even if you have now lost your job or broken off a relationship, it is also easy to find the good side in this. Give thanksfor the experience gained and prepare for new opportunities.
4. You are responsible for the relationship.
Accept the fact that everything that happens to you in life, you attracted with your decisions from the past. Yes, yes, if mistakes have occurred somewhere, they should be corrected or simply accepted. When your relationship with yourself is harmonious, then everything works out with those around you.
Relationship with your spirit.
Mental illnesses must be treated with action, or rather with good deeds.
What prevents you from loving yourself?
The answer to this question often opens the door to this treasure trove within us called “Self Love.” At the same time, opening these doors, it becomes clear and obvious to us that we will have to learn how to use this treasury.
Let's first look at what creates self-dislike within us.
Just a couple of decades ago, our society completely denied self-love and self-acceptance. This was condemned and called selfishness.
Each person is a whole system. This is our body, our emotions, our mind/intelligence. We are influenced by the family system, its values, environment, society. Education brings into our lives a certain attitude towards ourselves and a huge number of attitudes...
The very first thing we realize and through which we experience our life is this body.
Think about how many prohibitions are associated with our body: lying in bed for extra minutes is not allowed. Cosmetic procedures are often done because they have to. This is such an act of self-love. Buying beautiful things for yourself as much as you want is not permissible. Having sex the way we like is shameful. It’s impossible to enjoy your favorite food, we count calories... Soaking in the bath is a waste of time. And every time our internal impulses of what our body wants are suppressed, denied, explained by lack of time, money, etc.
Accepting our body as it is given to us is not at all possible. Women often grow up feeling that their body is ugly, that its impulses are not correct. And since no one explained in time that body sensations are an important source of our understanding of ourselves, fears of rejection of the body envelop us headlong, and we try our best not to hear our body, change it, reshape it, etc.
The body is the place where our feelings, our Soul, live. This is what we are connected with from the first moment of our life until our last breath.
Another facet of us that prevents us from loving and accepting ourselves is our emotions. Emotions, as well as the impulses of our body, were once banned. And both positive and negative. We are equally prohibited from demonstrating joy, happiness, pleasure, and anger, rage, and dissatisfaction.
We push our emotions deep and justify it with our upbringing. Meanwhile, emotions are our beacon that shows where our ship is sailing. Resentment has arisen - it means something is wrong with the boundaries in the relationship. Joy - great! We are sailing in the right direction. Emotions are what give us the opportunity to be aware of ourselves and correct our course.
Intelligence. Some people despise themselves for their intelligence. (Especially now, when all women around are told that this is not the most important quality and that the mind interferes with building relationships L) Someone suffers from limited mental abilities and considers himself not smart enough, advanced, etc. (I know women with several towers who think of themselves that they are not given enough intelligence).
And often we are dissatisfied with our life's path which we have to walk. It always seems to us that what is happening in our lives is nonsense, we want it to be different. Inside there are always complaints about how our life flows, how the people around us treat us.
But all these components determine our life. They cannot be ignored, they cannot be replaced, thrown away, updated! And while we play the game of how to adjust what I have, life slowly but surely becomes unbearable.
So, the time has come to stop, see all these limitations that prevent you from loving yourself and accepting yourself, and finally getting to know your real self. This acquaintance will slowly but surely help you love yourself and be happy.
So here are the first few steps.
- Take a few minutes in the morning or evening to look at your body, learn to notice what you like about it. Start complimenting yourself out loud. I warn you, it won't be easy. The Inner Critic has been trained for years to see flaws and shove them under your nose. The important thing here is to be patient and consistent. Let him grumble to himself, and you look at yourself in the mirror and look for what deserves a compliment.
- Learn to listen to what you feel. Your emotions are an important part of you. Copy your list of feelings into your phone or computer and when you feel emotions inside you, find the correct name for what you are experiencing. Trust me when you start telling yourself clearly, “I’m angry!” – Your life will become easier. Then you can conduct a small investigation on this topic: for whom? For what? Would you like that? And this is a sign of self-love. Or suddenly you realize: “I rejoice!” And, perhaps, you will immediately experience fear: what if the joy is not long-term, what if you suddenly get scared, jinx it, “will you cry later”? Great! You are already beginning to get acquainted with your deepest beliefs that are ruining your life!
- Your attitude towards your mind, your abilities, your potential - watch yourself. Observation will again allow you to see where you are limiting yourself and, perhaps, creating a powerful field for self-doubt.
Start praising yourself! Every day. Make it a rule every evening to write a list “I did well today!” At least 5 points.
- Change your habits! Learn to relax, if you don’t know how to allow yourself to relax, then set aside at least an hour of time on your day off to do nothing! Oh, I know how difficult this can be! And yet, start learning to DO NOTHING!
Let these small steps allow you to focus your attention on yourself. After all, self-love is being in touch with yourself. Feel yourself, be aware of yourself, respond to your needs. And observing yourself, doing these little exercises will allow you to get closer to this.
Good luck to you! Love yourself!
First step. Inner child
I am writing this text with great gratitude to the girls who come to my classes. You inspire me to get my act together and finally do what I’ve been meaning to do for a long time. Thank you for your trust, my dears! Thank you, you are the most magical!
Nowadays there is a lot of talk about self-love. And almost everyone understands that it is necessary to love yourself. But how exactly can you love yourself? After all, love is a verb, that is, an action.
I invite you to choose your own inner child as your love object. This is the very core of our soul, our creative part, it is also the most vulnerable and often the most abandoned. Our inner Adult and Parent grow to enormous sizes, and the Child is often left sitting abandoned in a corner. And then it seems to us that no one loves us, because it is this part of us that accepts love! It is our Child who knows the answer to the question: are we truly loved? He doesn't reason, he feels things like that.
If your Child is abandoned by you, then he cannot accept love. This means that deep down in your soul you can never be sure that you are loved. You will doubt the love of loved ones, men, even parents and your own children. Despite everything your mind tells you. You simply won't feel love directed towards you, it will seem to float by. It’s very, very hard to live like this! Moreover, in such a situation you will not be able to show your love.
The good news is
that you can fill your Child with love. There is a simple meditation for this that you can download. It needs to be done regularly, for example, once a week, until your Child becomes lively, cheerful and sociable. And then be sure to repeat it sometimes so that your girl doesn’t feel abandoned again.
And our inner girl needs to be pampered regularly! If you weren't spoiled enough as a child, you really need to do it now! And if everything was good in childhood, then all the more so, why wean ourselves from good things?
First you give her what she asks for in meditation. And then use your intuition, or just remember what you wanted as a child? Maybe you didn’t have this and you dreamed about it, or, on the contrary, would you be happy to repeat something from childhood?
For example, I painfully dreamed of a jewelry box. I had a box, and it was very beautiful, but it only contained hairpins and hair ties. But I wanted rings, beads... And those rings that I twisted for myself from thin colored telephone wire did not suit me. I wanted real ones! In the 70s, they didn’t sell this in the store in our village.
But now there’s a ton of this junk, and I never leave Mega or Continent without yet another children’s trinkets. Thanks to my nephew, there is somewhere to place them. I think she has the largest collection of “jewels” in kindergarten.
I also go to the cinema to watch cartoons, under the guise of “I need to take the child.” And my inner girl is delighted.
And a book about fairies! With gorgeous illustrations, in a soft foam cover... I never read it, I just bought it for my Girl. For two weeks she lay at home in the most visible place, and every time I glanced at her, I felt how happy my Girl was!
At every gem exhibition, I buy her (sometimes under the guise of “I need this for lithotherapy”) incredibly beautiful colored stones.
At the Novosibirsk zoo, just like in childhood, I spent a long time begging my husband for cotton candy. I whined like I did when I was four years old))) And as soon as I started eating it, smearing it all over my face, I felt like not just a little girl, but a happy little girl.
A big hello to my friend, who once treated me to a cockerel on a stick, just like in the USSR. It was a real cockerel, not a bullshit! Only burnt sugar, no flavorings, and a wooden stick, everything for real!
Buying a dress for the inner girl is a special song. There is nowhere to wear these clothes, of course, but no one bothers you to wear them at home. It looks better than a housecoat, believe me!
And also slides and bungee jumping in the water park, riding buns from the mountains in winter, modeling in the yard with my nephew. When she grows up, you'll see that her grandchildren will come too :-)
And be happy!
