“How to help your child cope with emotions”
(recommendations for parents)
Chernikova Olga Alexandrovna
KSU "Secondary school No. 10"
State Institution "Department of Education"
Akimat of Zhitikarinsky district"
Each of us wants our children to grow up healthy and happy, so that they can enjoy the world around them and a successful day, so that they are confident in their abilities and know how to deal with difficulties, endure the blows of fate, and maintain peace of mind in the most unforeseen situations.
Demonstration of the ability to deal with difficulties begins from the first days of a child’s life. But sometimes, trying to protect our child as much as possible, we cherish and protect him, prevent his desires and needs, and try to make his life as easy as possible. By doing this, we, adults, harm his psyche, “break” his emotional sphere. A child placed in such a situation does not develop emotionally, does not know how to cope with his emotions, does not learn to deal with the difficulties of life and solve problems that arise. This affects educational results, communication with peers and adults. The inability to live in harmony with oneself leads to physical health problems and various diseases. Children who are unable to overcome the fear of independent or test work become inattentive, absent-minded, make a large number of mistakes, and as a result receive a bad grade; strong fear prevents a student who knows the material well from answering. Children who cannot cope with anger and aggression usually have communication problems. If a child constantly hides his emotions and pushes them inside himself, this is harmful to his health.
What are emotions? Emotions are the inner experiences of a person. Emotions express a person’s attitude towards current or possible situations and are situational in nature.
Human emotional states include:
mood (the general persistent current emotional state of a person, which determines his general tone and activity);
affect (vivid, short-term emotional experience);
feelings (higher human emotions associated with those people, events, objects that are significant for a given person);
stress (a state of strong general tension, excitement in difficult, unusual, extreme conditions).
Emotions can be positive and negative. Most of us are satisfied with positive emotions; we want to keep them longer. But negative ones interfere, stress us, make us vulnerable (for example, anger, hatred, fear, disgust, etc.), so we want to get rid of them. How can we help our children with this? First you need to know what can cause negative emotions in a child. There are quite a few reasons, let’s highlight the main ones:
The contradiction between a strong desire and the inability to satisfy it (very clearly manifested in young children).
A conflict consisting of increased demands on a child who is unsure of his own abilities (observed in a situation where parents make excessive demands on the child in learning, which he clearly cannot handle).
Conflicting demands from parents and teachers.
Frequent negative emotional states of adults and lack of control and self-regulation skills on their part. In psychology, there is such a thing as “contagion,” that is, the involuntary transfer of an emotional state from one person to another. Therefore, it is important to learn yourself and teach your child to cope with their emotions.
The use of orders, accusations, threats, insults instead of confidential conversation and joint analysis of the situation.
Emotional education is a very delicate process. The main task is not to suppress and eradicate emotions, but to teach the child to direct them correctly. In my opinion, an important principle in the emotional education of children is “personal example.” A child learns a lot by looking at adults (parents, teachers), seeing their adequate expression of their emotions, and will certainly strive to imitate.
It is very important to teach a child to “throw out” negative emotions without harm to himself or others.
There are two ways to adequately express negative emotions:
1. Compassionate Listening.
In those moments when a child is under the pressure of negative emotions, he needs compassion. The name of the method speaks for itself. It consists of listening to the child in a calm atmosphere, without judging him or analyzing his behavior. A few minutes of silent affection and understanding is the main rule of this method. The child should feel that there is a person next to him who is ready to sympathize with any of his emotions. In the process of such a monologue, “liberation” from negativity occurs, and the child’s mood gradually improves.
2. “The method of solitude.” Some children, experiencing strong feelings and experiences, try to retire, to go somewhere where no one will disturb them. This is a way of creating a secluded place for experiences.
The child is secluded in order to:
His negative emotions did not bother others;
To give vent to the emotions that overwhelmed him;
In order not to cause a reaction from parents (or other people around him), which is sometimes humiliating and dangerous for the child himself.
The “solitude method” should not seem like a punishment to a child, so it is important for an adult to follow the following rules:
never lock the door of the room in which the child is alone;
When leaving a child alone, do not tell him the words so familiar to everyone from childhood: “Think about your behavior!” When left alone, the child should feel supported and understood;
do not force your child to talk to you if he does not want to do so.
Having been alone with himself, the child realizes what made him behave this way (get angry, cry, scream).
But it is not only through the words and behavior of parents that a child can feel parental support. Eye contact (whether we realize it or not) is the main means of communicating our love to our children. The more often parents look at their child with love, the more he is imbued with this love. However, other signals can be transmitted through eye contact. It is especially undesirable to use eye contact when parents make suggestions to the child, punish, scold, reproach him, etc. When parents use this powerful means of control mainly in a negative way, then the child sees his parent mainly in a negative way. While the child is small, fear makes him submissive and obedient, and outwardly this suits us quite well. But the child grows, and fear is replaced by anger, resentment, and depression.
A child listens to us most attentively when we look into his eyes. Anxious, insecure children need eye contact the most. A gentle look can reduce the level of anxiety.
It is important that deep down we can feel passionate love for our child, but this is not enough. It is through our behavior that the child feels our love for himself; he not only hears what we say, but also feels how we speak, and most importantly, what we do. Our actions have a much stronger effect on a child than words.
But we should not forget that each child is individual, and what is good for one is bad for another. Some people need to be alone in difficult times, while others need to be listened to. Tell your child about existing ways to adequately express his emotions, and he will choose the most acceptable one for him. And no matter what choice the child makes, the adult’s task is to understand, accept and support!
Natalia Gubaidullina
Training for parents “Negative emotions and ways to release”
Training for parents
Subject: « Negative emotions and ways to release»
Tasks:
Conduct an analysis of your own sources negative experiences;
Learn to recognize and safely dispose of « negative emotions» ;
Release accumulated tension.
1. Introductory part.
Meeting the participants training. Each participant introduces himself as present.
QUESTION: What mood did you come in? How are you feeling? What do you expect from today's meeting?
Warm-up game “Switch places those who...”. The leader goes to the center of the circle, his chair is removed. By naming a sign whose owners must change places, the presenter aims to take the place of one of the participants. For example, it is necessary to change places for those who have a son. While fathers and mothers of sons change places, the leader tries to take the place of one of them. The remaining participant becomes the leader.
The game is very fun helps relieve tension, creating a favorable psychological atmosphere.
2. Main part.
Emotion is a person’s mental state. They can be positive (joy, delight, laughter) And negative(fear, anger, anxiety).
QUESTION for discussion:
Which negative states, emotions most unpleasant to you? (on the stand there are cards with negative emotions: hatred, resentment, anger, anxiety, shame)
What are they for? negative emotions? And are they needed at all?
How do you deal with negative emotions?
During the discussion, a list is compiled (notebook "For the soul"). The resulting list is adjusted and supplemented during the work process. All negative emotions, such as self-hatred, anger, anxiety and shame, drain our energy and take away our strength.
Anger is one of the most dangerous and destructive human emotions.
QUESTION for discussion: “What is anger? When does he appear?
Anger is a clear manifestation of displeasure. We are angry at those who have hurt us, wronged us or let us down, we are angry at ourselves. Sometimes anger is used as a mask to hide fear or resentment. One way or another, each of us sometimes experiences dissatisfaction or anger. Anger is good emotion. But, not finding a way out, it remains inside the person, at the level of the body, and, as a rule, transforms into a disease or other disorders of the body. Anger arises for the same reason as dissatisfaction with oneself. When we get angry without feeling empowered to express our feelings openly, the words of rage get stuck in our throats. Anger does not leave our body, and the consequence of this is resentment, bitterness, and depression. Therefore, it would be nice to learn how to manage your feeling at the moment of its occurrence. When negative emotion is realized and tracked - it goes away forever.
Most people use three way dealing with your feelings and emotions: suppression, expression and avoidance.
Suppression is the worst method, because the suppressed emotions and feelings do not go away, but grow and fester inside us, causing anxiety, tension, depression and a whole range of stress-related problems. The suppressed energy of these emotions eventually begins to control you ways, which you do not like and are beyond your control.
Expression is a kind of ventilation. "Exploding" sometimes or "losing patience" We let's free ourselves from the oppression of accumulated emotions. You may even feel good because it translates energy into action. But this does not mean that you have gotten rid of these feelings, this is just temporary relief. Moreover, the expression of our emotions can be unpleasant for the person receiving it all. This, in turn, can cause even more stress as we begin to feel guilty for hurting someone by expressing our natural feelings.
Avoidance is way to deal with emotions, distracting from them through all sorts of entertainment: conversations, TV, food, smoking, drinking, drugs, movies, sex, etc. But despite our attempts at avoidance, all these feelings are still there and continue to take their toll on us in the form of tension. Thus, avoidance is just a form of suppression.
How to behave when you appear negative emotion:
1. Stand up if necessary and, apologizing, leave the room. Take every chance to wet your forehead, temples and arteries in your hands with cold water.
2. Slowly look around, even if the room you are in is familiar to you or looks quite ordinary. As you move your gaze from one object to another, mentally describe their appearance.
3. Then look out the window at the sky. Focus on what you see. When was the last time you looked at the sky like this? Drink a glass of water.
4. Monitor your breathing again. Breathe slowly through nose: After inhaling, hold your breath for a while, then just as slowly, through your nose, exhale. With each exhalation, focus on how your shoulders relax and lower.
5. Do some relaxation exercises to help you calm down. voltage:
(doing exercises together)
Exercise 1. Starting position - standing, arms down. Raise your right shoulder, touch your shoulder to your earlobe. You cannot tilt your head. Lock the position. Drop your shoulder, just throw it down. Repeat the same with your left shoulder. Repeat the exercise until you feel a feeling of heaviness in your shoulders.
Exercise 2. Starting position - standing. Raise your hands in front of you. Clench both palms into fists as tightly as possible. Tighten your arms, stretching them forward as far as possible. Abruptly release tension by unclenching your fists and dropping your hands. Your fingers should feel warm and tingling.
Exercise 3. Initial position: sitting. The back is straight. Raise your legs in front of you so that they are parallel to the floor. Keep it as long as you can. Then release the tension by dropping your feet to the floor. This exercise helps relieve muscle tension in the hips.
PRACTICAL WORK: Relaxation music is used.
« Inner beam» - the method can be used at the initial stage of irritation, when self-control is impaired, psychological contact in communication disappears, and alienation appears.
To complete it, you need to relax and imagine the following pictures.
A light beam appears in the upper part, which moves from top to bottom and slowly illuminates the face, neck, shoulders, hands with a warm, even and pleasant light. As the beam moves, wrinkles are smoothed out, tension in the back of the head disappears, folds on the forehead are weakened, "fall" brows, "cooling down" eyes, the clamps in the corners of the lips loosen, shoulders drop, frees the neck and chest. Light interior the beam creates the appearance of a new calm, confident and prosperous person.
Discussion
6. Throw out your pent-up energy, your irritation and anger. What ways you can do this? (Discussion with parents) .
There are several types of positive approaches to anger. One of the best is to openly tell the person you are angry with how you feel about them. You can say: "I'm angry with you because."
The second one is good way getting rid of anger is talking to your reflection in the mirror.
There are others ways to express anger:
(information is posted on the stand)
sing your favorite song out loud
beat the punching bag
To water flowers
do fitness
rearrange the furniture in the apartment
draw the offender and erase him
take up knitting
crumple or tear the paper
watch your favorite movie
listen to music
relaxation
shout out loud
express your anger to the offender
meditation
put your feelings on paper
PRACTICAL WORK: Music is used – 4 wishes
One of ways to deal with negative emotions- learn to understand and express them.
An exercise that will allow you to gain some experience of psychological self-help:
1. Take colored pencils or markers. Before you start drawing, allow yourself to relax and calm down for a few seconds.
2. Now let your hand start drawing. Let your hand draw whatever it pleases, abstract and concrete. The quality of the drawing does not matter. And let the hand move as it wants - smoothly or abruptly, slowly or quickly.
3. When you feel like you have completed the drawing, study it. Is it really complete or is there something missing? If yes, then add whatever you want.
4. Accept your drawing as a person who has come from a distant country whose customs are very different from ours. Instead of judging the drawing, listen to what it says.
5. Analyze your drawing and answer questions:
a) in what manner is the drawing made? (childish, nervous, mechanical, etc.);
b) how the color is used (colored or not, bright or pastel, light or dark);
c) how the space is used (not enough space, left unfilled or used haphazardly);
d) static or dynamic pattern (is there any movement, is it smooth or jerky, restrained or rapid);
e) what is the relationship between the elements (oppose each other, crowd together, drawn together, separately);
e) what is the general mood (dark, tense, etc.).
Then look at the drawing again, as if reliving your state, and decide whether to leave it or whether it’s better to energetically, with pleasure, tear it apart, crumple up the scraps and throw them in the trash - it’s up to you. Together with the discarded drawing, you get rid of your bad mood and find peace.
This exercise helps to better understand and express feelings artistically.
3. Final part.
Summing up the lesson. How did your condition change during the meeting? Has it changed at all? How are you feeling now? What problems of other participants were close to you? Which ones are new? ways solutions to the problem you found out today?
This requires two conditions.
1. Parents are able and willing to listen.
With sympathy, they try to tune in to the wave of the child’s emotions.
Any person, including a child, is in dire need of empathy in those moments when he is under the pressure of negative emotions. We need someone who can empathize without trying to judge or even analyze what is happening to us. Expressing understanding and sympathy is one of the highest manifestations of parental love. This ability to listen is a kind of magic button that leads to calm and peace of the child, and, as a result, to his desire to cooperate.
2. Parents know how to experience their own negative emotions.
We cannot truly help others get rid of negative emotions if we ourselves are disposed to experience only positive emotions (according to our philosophy of life, for example). If we are overwhelmed with negative emotions and don’t know how to get rid of them, then even with all the desire and understanding of the importance of listening to loved ones (husband, wife, child), we are unable to do this, and the process of communication itself turns into torture. Because it is very difficult to pour garbage into a container from which everything is already spilling over the edge and the lid does not close.
The ability to voluntarily experience negative emotions is not a manifestation of some kind of masochism, as many may think. This ability makes it possible to cleanse yourself of them. In order to later become a container (yes, alas, no matter how bitter it may sound) for the negative emotions of those people who are under our care. And the first in line for this are our children.
Where do a child’s negative emotions come from?
There are a thousand reasons why we may not get what we want in this world. There are 6 billion people on the planet and billions of other living beings who also have their own desires. And when our desires contradict the desires of others, we inevitably experience some of the negative emotions (resentment, anger, grief, shame).
Even just from observing some external objects, attachment to them can appear. In our minds, we begin to consider it real and accessible. In the same way, if a child sees something that shines, blinks or makes some sounds, then a picture is drawn in his mind of how he plays with it. But when he reaches out his hand, the reality is that it is not intended for his game, because it is either his parents' electronic key, or a cell phone, or something dangerous, etc.
Two ways to help your child cope with negative emotions
1. The principle of “Five seconds of silence.”
If a child does not get what he wants, there is no need to prevent him from experiencing the grief of loss. There is no need to devalue his feelings, forbid him to show them, reproach, scold, persuade, or give advice. read morals, appeal to a philosophical understanding of life, try to amuse or distract. The child does not need this false inspiration; it will not help him truly calm down and survive the trouble.
Children have more pronounced emotions. They have virtually no control over them. Even adults cannot always control them. To a child, everything seems more tragic and extended in time (one might even say endless) than to adults, who understand the limits of the problem and cannot appreciate the strength of the child’s grief. Therefore, the best way to support in this case is believe. Believe that the child has serious reasons to feel this way. Even if to us, adults, with developed logical thinking, with the power of reason, with philosophical attitudes, they seem like trifles.
But there is no need to try too hard to “settle” everything, to give, to satisfy, since the child’s mood will become dependent on “giving” and “sorting out.” There will not always be situations where we can “give” or “settle.” In the end, one day we will no longer be with the child, and he will find himself in a very difficult situation.
Parents who constantly “give” and “settle” deprive the child of the opportunity to have the strength to survive negative emotions in order to look optimistically at the shadow sides of life, find new solutions, and in some cases, calmly accept them as a given of their fate. Learning to cope with loss and failure is an important skill for success in life. One of the secrets to success in life is the ability to survive loss and failure.
It’s easy to overcome negative emotions a few minutes of sympathy, understanding, support. It helps to switch to this wave of sympathy principle of “Five seconds of silence”.
So, when you see that your child is worried about something, pause for 5 seconds, and then try to say something like the following:
Instead of “It’s okay, it’ll heal before the wedding” (devaluation of feelings) - “I know you’re hurt. Come here, I'll feel sorry for you. Come to me"
Instead of “Don’t cry!” (prohibition) - “I understand. Are you disappointed"
Instead of “Don’t worry” (advice) - “Yes, it’s not easy. I know how worried you are."
Instead of “Well, it’ll work out next time” - “If this happened to me, I would also be very upset.”
Instead of “Nothing, everything will be fine tomorrow” (persuasion) - “I understand it’s hard for you. I would also be very sad if this happened to me.”
Instead of “You can’t win everyone” (moral instruction) - “I understand, you’re offended. I would also be very upset."
Instead of “Well, what can you do – this is life!” (appeal to a philosophical understanding of life) - “You are absolutely right to be angry. I would be angry too."
Instead of “It could have been worse” - “I see you’re scared. I would be afraid too."
Then there can be two scenarios. The first is that the child’s mood improves. Secondly, the child’s mood deteriorates and he continues to talk about his negative emotions, which usually frightens parents. But this does not mean that the principle does not work, or that you misunderstood it. Simply with your support, you opened the “tap” of the child’s negative emotions and gave an outlet to their flow.
That is, a kind of “starting shot” occurs: the child feels safe (there is a loving person nearby who is ready to sympathize with any of his emotions), and in order to free himself from the negative emotions weighing him down, he begins to show them even more. Yes, it scares parents. But after some time, when the process is over, the child’s mood still improves. This process occurs on its own, without any punishments, reproaches for being spoiled or threats of punishment, without the need to switch attention, persuade or otherwise suppress negative emotions.
R. Narushevich, from the lecture “How can they cope with their “crazy”?”
Description of the material: Methodological recommendations will help parents assess and help their child’s state of mind and negative emotions. The proposed exercises and tips are necessary to maintain psychophysical health, and the ability to talk about your problems will help you establish contacts with others and understand yourself (parents can also do them with their child).
« How to help your child and yourself overcome negative emotions"
Dear parents ! Tell your child:
“Listen to yourself. If your mood could be colored, what color would it be? What animal or plant does your mood resemble? What color is joy, sadness, anxiety, fear? You can keep a “mood diary” in which your child will draw his mood every day. It could be faces, landscapes, people, whatever he likes best .
Draw the outline of a man.
Now let the child imagine that the little man is happy, let him shade with a pencil the place where, in his opinion, this feeling is located in the body. Then also “feel” resentment, anger, fear, happiness, anxiety
etc. For each emotion, the child must choose his own color.
Discuss ways to express anger with your child..
Let him (and you yourself) try to answer the questions:
1.What can make you angry?
2. How do you behave when you're angry?
3. How do you feel when you are angry?
4. What will you do to avoid trouble at these moments?
5.What are the words that people say when they are angry?
6. And if you hear words that are offensive to you, what do you feel, what do you do?
7. What words are the most offensive to you?
It is advisable to write down the answers so that you can discuss them with your child later. For example, what words can be used when angry, and what words should not be used, because they are too harsh and unpleasant.
Dear moms and dads, the following special exercises will help you learn to cope with anger
1.Build together with the baby, “make faces” in front of the mirror. Portray various emotions, especially pay attention to the facial expressions of an angry person
2.Draw together prohibiting the “STOP” sign and agree that as soon as the child feels that he is starting to get very angry, he will immediately take out this sign and say out loud or silently “STOP!” You yourself can also try to use such a sign to curb your anger.
3.To teach child to calmly communicate with people, play like this: pick up some attractive object. The child’s task is to persuade you to give this item. You give away the item whenever you want. The game can then be complicated: the child asks only with the help of facial expressions, gestures, but without words. You can change places - you ask the child. After finishing the game, discuss how it is easier to ask, what techniques and actions influenced your decision to give the toy, discuss the feelings that the players experienced.
4. Teach your child(and yourself) express anger in an acceptable way. Explain that it is imperative to talk through all negative situations with adults or friends. Teach your child verbal forms of expressing anger and irritation (“I’m upset, this offended me”).
Offer to use “miracle things” to throw out negative emotions.
Cup(you can shout into it);
sheets of paper( they can be crushed, torn, thrown with force at a target on the wall);
pencils(they can be used to draw an unpleasant situation, and then shade or crumple the drawing);
plasticine(you can make a figurine of the offender from it, and then crush it or remake it);
Bobo pillow( it can be thrown, hit, kicked).
5.Remedy"fast discharge". If the child is overexcited, “on the edge,” then ask him to quickly run, jump or sing a song loudly.
6. Game “Name-calling”. When throwing a ball or ball to each other, call them harmless names: names of fruits, flowers, vegetables. For example, “You are a dandelion!”, “And you are a melon!” And so on until the flow of words dries up.
How does this game help?
If you get angry with a child, want to “teach him a lesson”, remember funny “name-calling”, perhaps even name the child, he will not be offended, and you will get emotional release
Teach your child to manage his emotions from the age of five.
Can clench your fists tightly, tense your arm muscles, then gradually relax, “letting go” of the negative.
Can imagine yourself as a lion! “He is handsome, calm, confident in his abilities, his head is raised proudly, his shoulders are straightened. His name is like you (child), he has your eyes, body, you are a lion !»
Very very press your heels onto the floor, your whole body, arms, legs are tense; the teeth are firmly connected. You are a mighty tree, very strong, you have strong roots that go deep into the ground, no one is afraid of you. This is the pose of a confident person .
If your child begins to get angry, ask him to take a few slow breaths or exhale or count to 5-10. Pushing emotions inside and trying to hide them is very harmful. The consequences of such actions are heart disease, neuroses, high blood pressure in older age, plus misunderstanding of others, high irritability, aggressiveness, and communication problems.
REMEMBER!
Emotional release is necessary to maintain psychophysical health, and the ability to talk about your problems will help you establish contacts with others and understand yourself
In the recommendations you can find answers to the questions: “How to teach a child to manage his emotions?” "How to help your child and yourself overcome negative emotions?" “How to teach a child to control himself?” “What are the ways to express anger?
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Teach your child to manage his emotions
(From five years)
You can clench your fists tightly, tense your arm muscles, then gradually relax, “letting go” of the negative.
You can imagine yourself as a lion! “He is handsome, calm, confident in his abilities, his head is raised proudly, his shoulders are straightened. His name is like you (the child), he has your eyes, your body. You are a lion!
Press your heels very, very hard onto the floor, your whole body, arms, legs are tense; the teeth are firmly connected. “You are a mighty tree, very strong, you have strong roots that go deep into the ground, no one is afraid of you. This is the pose of a confident person."
If your child starts to get angry, ask him to take a few slow breaths or count to 5-10.
Have you already realized that pushing emotions inside, trying to hide them, is very harmful?
The consequences of such actions are heart disease, neuroses, high blood pressure in older age, plus misunderstanding of others, high irritability, aggressiveness, and communication problems.
Therefore, teach your child and learn to show emotions yourself, to “throw them out” without harm to others.
Emotional release is necessary for maintaining health(physical and mental), and the ability to talk about your problems will help you establish contacts with others and understand yourself.
Learn to deal with anger.
Special techniques and exercises.
1. Make “faces” together with your baby in front of the mirror.Portray different emotions, pay special attention to the facial expressions of an angry person.
2. Draw together a prohibition STOP sign and agree that as soon as the child feels that he is starting to get very angry, he will immediately take out this sign and say out loud or to himself “Stop!” You can also try using this sign yourself.to control your anger.Using this technique requires training for several days for the skill to become established.
3. To teach your child to communicate calmly with people, play like this: pick up some attractive object (toy, book). The child’s task is to persuade you to give this item. You give away the item whenever you want. The game can then be complicated: the child asks only with the help of facial expressions, gestures, but without words. You can change places - you ask the child. After finishing the game, discuss how it is easier to ask, what techniques and actions influenced your decision to give the toy, discuss the feelings that the players experienced.
4. Teach your child (and yourself)express anger in an acceptable way.
Explain that it is imperative to talk through all negative situations with your parents or friends. Teach your child verbal forms of expressing anger and irritation (“I’m upset, this offended me”).
Offer to use"miracle things" to release negative emotions:
– a cup (you can shout into it);
– a basin or bathtub with water (you can throw rubber toys into them);
– sheets of paper (they can be crushed, torn, thrown with force at a target on the wall);
– pencils (you can use them to draw an unpleasant situation, and then shade or crumple the drawing);
– plasticine (you can make a figurine of the offender from it, and then crush it or remake it);
– “Bobo” pillow(you can throw it, hit it, kick it).Provide a separate “discharge” pillow, you can sew eyes and a mouth to it; You should not use soft toys and dolls for this purpose, but a punching bag will do.
5. "Fast discharge" agentIf you see that the child is overexcited, “on the edge,” then ask him to quicklyrun, jump or sing a song (very loud).
6. Game “Name-calling”.
To eliminate offensive words from everyday communication, call me names! When throwing a ball or ball to each other, call them harmless names. These could be the names of fruits, flowers, vegetables. For example: “You are a dandelion!”, “And then you are a melon!” And so on until the flow of words dries up.
How does this game help? If you get angry with a child, want to “teach him a lesson”, remember the funny “name-calling”, perhaps even name the child, he will not be offended, and you will get emotional release. When, having the skill of such a game, the child calls the offender “cucumber” (and not...), you will undoubtedly feel satisfied.
All these “miracle things” can be used by adults too!
How to help your child and yourself overcome
negative emotions?
How to teach a child self-control?
Many adults, not to mention children, cannot describe what is going on in their souls, what they are dissatisfied with. But if a person knows how to assess his state of mind, it will be easier for both those around him and himself.
Try the following exercises to develop your ability to understand yourself.
(You can do them with your child too).
Tell your child: “Listen to yourself. If your mood could be colored, what color would it be? What animal or plant does your mood resemble? What color is joy, sadness, anxiety, fear?” You can keep a “mood diary”. In it, the child will draw his mood every day (maybe several times a day). These could be faces, landscapes, people, whatever he likes best.
Draw the outline of a man. Now let the child imagine that the little man is happy, let him shade with a pencil the place where, in his opinion, this feeling is located in the body. Then also “feel” the resentment, anger, fear, happiness, anxiety, etc. For each emotion, the child must choose his own color. You can sketch one person or different ones (for example, if the baby wants to place happiness and joy in one place).
- Discuss ways to express anger with your child.
Let him (and you yourself) try to answer the questions:
1. What can make you angry?
2. How do you behave when you're angry?
3. How do you feel when you are angry?
4. What will you do to avoid trouble at these moments?
5. Name the words that people say when they are angry.
6. And if you hear words that are offensive to yourself, what do you feel, what do you do?
7. What words are the most offensive to you?
It is advisable to write down the answers so that you can discuss them with your child later.
For example, what words can be used when angry, and what words should not be used, because... they are too harsh and unpleasant.
